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Why Pineapples are awesome

Inspired by an exchange on facebook with a friend from high school who wanted to know why I was obsessed with pineapples (when obviously I’m in fact obsessed with corn), I’ve developed a list of why pineapples are awesome even though they’re no Zea mays.

  • Firstly and most importantly: As much as I love corn, corn is not tasty. Pineapples are tasty.
  • Among fruits, I’d say pineapples give me the justification for using the biggest knife.
  • In xkcd pineapples proudly stand in the upper left quadrant, indicating both their tastiness and difficulty of preparation making the preparation and consumption of Pineapple a worthy occupation of manly men see previous comment regarding knives.
  • You can’t make jello with fresh pineapple because it’s so corrosive it breaks down the gelatin and other proteins. Hence, more dangerous, and therefore more manly.
  • According to wikipedia the fruit of the pineapple plant is formed by the fusion of two helixes of flowers (like the double helix of DNA!).
  • Pineapples appear is some form in almost every episode of Psych
  • The phylogeny of the pineapple. This will be explained in a more detailed phylogeny post tomorrow evening.

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